looking at porn together can be good for you

Everyone is different, and not all individuals or couples respond to porn in the same way. Not all porn is used as a substitute or a fantasy whether it be images or words, and comparisons are not necessarily being made.

I have learned that for my guy and surely other men as well with their partners, porn only stokes the fires of his passions for me, or sometimes it's an amusement, as a tease to be reignited at another time.

Who doesn't enjoy being aroused after all? He uses porn as a tool to arouse himself for me, not for use as an empty evacuation or ejaculation, rarely that is. The images are objects of arousal, not figures of desire.

Men like my man have a wonderful way of being attracted to nearly any image of a naked woman and not desire them. There is a clear difference in their minds and hearts between momentary eroticism in a picture or even a woman passing on the street or even a stripper in the flesh and the full bodied response, heart and soul included, they have for their beloved.

Porn for this kind of man creates a direct connection between eyeballs and penis. There is no stopping along the way. When he see me on the other hand there is, the brain, the heart. A difference of which he's well aware.

This is something most women cannot fathom. We may or may not fantasize about images we see or words we read, but we can imagine, feel sometimes all sensations, touch, smell, taste even, as if we are there, and we can create fantastic scenarios. For most men this is not true.

For me now that have mostly healed from my deeper stuff and mostly reconciled myself with porn, I now share it with my man or look at it alone, and it can be arousing and fun, yet what could possibly be better than sex with my man? The real thing could never compare to a two-dimensional unreal image, and I know he feels the same.

Sex has never been boring with us; it keeps getting better and better in fact. Much has to do with me letting my stuff go and opening up in all ways, body, mind, heart, and spirit.

I have also found that men take our lead in this. They find something through our hearts for which there is not one word. It's aspects of the following; love, a balance, an ease, peace, harmony, joy, and more. It's not that they can't find these things without us; they can, yet in a loving union, it's such a wonderful and maybe richer way to do so.

But it works both ways. The more we open to them, the more they will open to us, and the deeper we can go. What a lovely symbiosis.

Maybe we're both lucky in what we have with each other, for he is my brand of white knight in shining armor, and I am his loving hussy slut ho.